Thanks!

Thanks for your continued support in praying for Jake! 
Since the cancer is still active in his tumor, he is having it removed on June 29th.
 Please pray that Jake's body will release the tumor and all the cancer cells it's holding.

Some Good News!

For the first time this year, my Lilac bush had a flower on it.  It smelled so gooooood!

Spencer is turning 14 tomorrow!  I asked him what he wanted for his birthday.  His list was as follows: 
An omlet for breakfast
Grilled Cheese for lunch
Mac and Cheese for dinner
and $10.  I scored on this one!!!

I am scheduled to get my missing tooth put on July 1.  I was blessed to have an Endodontist donate the majority of the cost of an implant for one of my terrible teeth!  I get the temporary crown on the first.  I didn't mention it before because then you would notice it more.  I figured if I didn't make a big deal, no one would really notice!

I don't think my cucumbers are coming up this year.  I hope some of my neighbors will have spares!

I'm a bit nervous to find out the results of Jake's scan on Wednesday.  I stocked up on hugs from some of my friends at church today.  I hope that will hold me through the week.  A few people asked me about Jake in church today...which reminded me that he wasn't doing as well as we had hoped.  I didn't like that the doctor said it might be bad news...I guess she just wanted me to prepare my heart for whatever the results may be...good or bad.  I won't know anything until Thursday.  The doctor won't give me the "game plan" until Friday.

I'll post whatever it is...but perhaps you shouldn't call if it's bad because it would not help me to have to talk about it.  But if you could find some time to come give me a hug...that may help give me the strength to help me get through this.

My trainer put me on a strict diet this week so no birthday cake, white bread or treats for me.  I have lost about 30 lbs from January and not quite 20 lbs from my Biggest Loser Contest.  I have been meeting the goals I have set for weight loss.  It does feel good off!  I may not be able to control what goes on around me, but I can control what goes in my mouth!

I am grateful for the nicer weather we have been having!  Zack and John got the cooler running and we will be getting a new set of roof shingles soon.  The shingles are curling, which I found out was because they didn't put vents on our roof.  The first bid was $4800...cough, cough!

What else I didn't say...

I tell my friends "I'm fine...Jake's fine!", but if you want to know how we really feel, go look at my blog!

I'm very nervous about Jake right now!  Hoping that I was ready to be a support to other families going through the same experience, I looked up some blogs of other Rhabdo patients.  I guess I'm not ready.  Too much information (TMI)!  I was surprised at how many sets of twins were affected (one of the two).  I think I came across 3 other sets of twins where one twin was affected by Rhabdo.  Then I came across an article that said that adults with the same stage cancer as children have a much less chance of survival!  I didn't need to see that...did I?

I talked to Jake's doctor today and expressed my disappointment in the fact that his tumor was actually larger than when we started.  She didn't remember it being 4 cm to start, but she will check it out and get back to me tomorrow.  His swelling is worse in his foot and leg.  His skin is getting tighter on his leg! This doesn't seem like an improvement to me.  His pain is the same...not improved.

I have to say...I was hoping that after the last chemo treatment they would say..."All better!  Your life can go back to normal now!  These little set backs are like stabs in the heart...wounding my hope!  You know how you feel when you have been doing a very hard job and you think you're almost finished and someone comes and brings another load and says you can't go home until it's finished...and there might be more after that?  (Sigh!)  I'm just saying.....